Virtualisation should make life more flexible

I use a Mac as do many of my colleagues, although the majority of my company use PCs. Using a Mac isn't completely trouble free as some of the intranet applications I need to use are PC/IE only. I heard my company was providing Virtual Machines of the corporate PC build to testers and thought this would be ideal - I could run the corporate PC as an official VM and not have to have a second PC lying around for those times when something will only work on PC/IE.

Apparently that would be too easy as when I contacted the Terry who dished them out I was told "Sorry, we do not provide a corporate VM for running on Mac devices" and was told to contact a second Terry to query the policy. Despite leaving voicemail & sending email I'm being ignored.

Pushing Terry #1 a bit more went nowhere either and was just met with "I am not the decision maker here. I have more than enough on my plate, and no particular desire to challenge on this".

Well thanks for your help Terry!

Complexity

I came across this family tree of US Telecommunications companies:
http://www.neatorama.com/neat/family-tree-telecommunication.htm

This quote caught my eye:
"Since the very first telephone companies were founded, it seems that telecommunication companies never do business as just one entity when ten would do. Whatever the reason - be it compliance with local regulations, taking advantages of tax loopholes, obfuscation or simply fondness of complexity - subsidiaries and complex corporate structures are the raison d'être for these companies."

It seems complexity is a family trait for Terry that he just can't shake off.

Terry & Process

Terry loves process. Processes are necessary in order to build & deliver consistent services but process for process' sake is bad.

It always amazes me how many processes are required to get anything done with Terry. This process bloat seriously hampers the time taken to get a service to market. I've lost count of the number of projects where there appears to be more delivery (aka process) managers than there are people actually delivering the product or service.

Every now and again I hear that the bloat will be stripped away (along with the associated middle management) but it always creeps (often runs) back in and we're back to process bloat in no time.

Maybe it's because Terry is very comfortable when he has a process to follow - it's like a comfort blanket for him, he doesn't need to think for himself he's just following the process or maybe it's a symptom of a large company where people have to find someway to appear useful & important in order to perpetuate their justification for being employed?

Dilbert & Terry (2)

Allen is Terry!

Pipe Dreams

Terry likes selling bandwidth pipes. It's something he can understand because selling bandwidth pipes is pretty similar to selling circuits and Terry has been selling circuits his entire life.

However, Terry needs to stop just selling pipes and start to sell services. Pipes are a commodity business with low (and ever decreasing) margins. Services are where the revenues are, pipes are just a means to deliver the services.

If Terry doesn't start to sell high margin services as well as pipes then someone else will be selling the high margin services and keeping the revenue to themselves leaving Terry with just his low margin pipes. In fact it's already happening and Terry is at risk of being left behind before he even starts.

Terry-O-Meter

I have added a Terry-O-Meter to the left hand side of the page which I will use to show my current level of frustration caused by Terry.

Dilbert & Terry

I know how Asok feels...

Corporate Epidemics

My musing on Corporate Immune systems prompted me to finally read Malcolm Gladwell's The Tipping Point. The book is all about epidemics, specifically what causes social epidemics like fashion trends or crime sprees/declines etc.

I started wondering whether the same principles can be used to create a corporate epidemic - specifically one targetted at Terry's immune system.

The things that causes an event to "tip" and become an epidemic are often small and seemingly inconsequential. Rarely is an epidemic caused by a single big event although that is often what is concluded as a result of superficial analysis. This got me thinking that the way to combat Terry is not with big events but with many small, grass roots level changes.

Gladwell concludes that the cause of social epidemics is a combination of:

1. A small group of extraordinary people who produce the original idea/strategy/marketing/etc.
2. A group of "connectors" who have the contacts and personal relationships required to spread the idea.
3. The "stickiness" of the idea - i.e. how memorable it is so that it sparks people into action.
4. The ability for the idea to move from popularity amongst Early Adopters and be picked up by the Mainstream.
   

The first three are relatively easy to achieve provided you have the right people and even if you don't you can hire them. Number four is IMO the hardest part of all and why so many good ideas either fail or are defeated by the corporate immune system.

To achieve number four requires that the original idea is translated into a form that is understandable by and palatable to Terry. This doesn't require that the idea is dramatically changed from its original form, just that it is presented to Terry in a manner that he can comprehend and consequently it pushes the right buttons to spur him into action. Once a few Terries have picked up the idea, it will likely cascade and and become an epidemic infecting Terries at every level within the organisation. The best bit of all is that once infected Terry won't even realise what has happened.

Therefore, good ideas & good people aren't enough unless you also have the "translators" that can infect Terry with those ideas and cause Terry to create his own corporate epidemics that are ultimately his downfall and conversion from Terry to Non-Terry.

Institutionalisation

Terry is institutionalised. The structure and routine that Terry has followed for many years has lead to a narrowing and reduction in his ability to perform critical judgement and reasoning.

Just like a long term prisoner, Terry is surrounded by barriers that prevent his escape, only the barriers are often not imposed upon him but are of Terry's own making.

Unlike a prisoner, Terry does have the option of escape by seeking a new employer but, like many prisoners, escape is often not an option considered by Terry as his institutionalisation means he is unable to integrate himself back into the wider telecommunications society.

Terry has therefore condemned himself to a life sentence, where life means until retirement.

Is there anything we can do to help Terry reintegrate back into society?

Technology as a service

Terry doesn't sell services, he sells technology. This leads to a proliferation of service specific platforms, a migration nightmare for Terry's customers and additional costs for Terry as it makes platform closure more difficult than it should be.

What customers want is service, they don't (generally) care what the underlying technology is as long as their service requirements and SLAs are met.

Services should be decoupled from the technology used to deliver them. This has a number of advantages including:

- The ability to deliver the same service over a range of delivery technologies/networks (including ones that Terry does not own).
- The ability to change the delivery technology/network without having to change the service definition.
- The ability to offer converged services even if the underlying technology/network platforms aren't converged.
- Etc.

Terry is trying to decouple his services from the delivery technology but it requires a holistic approach and this is a new concept for Terry and one he is struggling with. By the time he gets there will it be too late?

Walled Gardens

Terry loves walled gardens. He appears to have extended the concept to his building security. As I was leaving tonight I saw a number of visitors trying to leave the building but their visitors badges did not work on the automatic security gates so they couldn't get out. What did Terry's security guard do? Open the gate for the visitors as you'd expect, oh no, he refused to let them out.

It would appear that Terry is no longer just a mindset, it's a disease and it's spreading. Time for mandatory vaccinations.

I was only following the project plan

Terry doesn't think for himself. Terry doesn't question his 'orders'. Terry doesn't or can't consider the big picture. All Terry cares about is ticking off the tasks in his project plan and delivering his project on time (which he frequently fails to do).

The result for Terry: An inability to offer truly converged services as each service is defined and delivered in isolation (on separate, often incompatible, platforms) without any consideration for the other services that Terry offers.

The result for Terry's customers: Frustration and confusion!

The solution: Terry should be held to account for his telecommunications crimes.